So we were assigned a classmates Monologue book to critique on our blog. I traded books with Ms. Julie Press because she tries hard and makes me want to be not cynical. She gave my book a nice critique and was right on a lot of points (some of my text wasn't clear as it could have been, I broke a rule or two, and some of my color choices could have been better). I think she thinks I am mad at her, nope, not mad at you Julie. You did a fine job.
Julie wanted a hard hitting critique because she wants to get better at Typography, and I like that, but I don't know how hard hitting I can be. One of the biggest problems I have with critiquing like this is that aside from just pointing out general design terms (stuff being balanced, clarity, general craftsmanship, basic ascetic things really ) there really isn't any concrete advice I can give her that's not just me saying "Well I would do it like this." I tried to make my book pop with lots of color and a bunch of activity, and while I succeeded in some ways I failed in others. Maybe my particular style choices won't mesh well with what Julie could be going for. Ultimately to get a good grade we just have to do what the professor wants, but sometimes I'm not really sure exactly what that is. With that being mentioned, lets just get to critiquing her work.
Julie's book was well made and I thought her new color scheme (originally it was blue and white) fit a beach theme well. She basically chose the colors of Argentina, but I don't think she did that on purpose. If she did do that on purpose and was being clever, I appreciate that. Julie followed all the project rules to a T. All the assigned aspects were included in a satisfactory manner.
Storytelling wise the text moves in a general direction and doesn't really get confusing at any point. Everything is easily readable and there aren't really any confusing points aside from where the two "NEVER"s are next to each other. The way your eye moves across the page it looks like it says "NEVER AND NEVER" for a second. That is the only real technical typography problem with the Julie's book I can find as everything else works just fine.
The only thing I would have done differently is spaced out that one big chunk of paragraph on the page that says "For mine, blah blah blah chunk on the right side." It's just a plain sentence that is centered on a blue background. I think Julie could have done something differently here, like maybe have used the whole spread page for the text chunk in a different way. Perhaps she could have curved them together so they resembled waves in the ocean /\/\/\/\/\/\ <===Like this maybe, but appropriately spaced out.
Overall Julie's book is successful and gets the job done, but may be a bit plain in some areas for my taste. This may not have much credo coming from someone who probably made his book too busy to its own detriment, but if Julie added a little bit of spice to some of her spreads she could have made her successful book that much better. She could have utilized more page space in some areas to offset some of the calmer spreads. Maybe Julie could have altered some of her text to to make it feel like the words on the page or put some of the sentences on a curve in some manner? I think despite differing on stylistic choices she did a fine job and should get at the very least a B for her work. Good job Julie, I hope the professor gives you an A.
A critique is to be constructive and is a good opportunities to collaborate and learn from others. A helpful tip would be to maintain respect for your classmates, when you are ALWAYS so cynical people stop listening to you. It’s too bad because you have good points that are of value but everyone has stopped listening. “Ultimately to get a good grade we just have to do what the professor wants” It’s not about what I what it’s about what works best for the project, and yes as an expert in the field my critiques carry more weight. However if you are more concerned about grades than pushing yourself and making the best design work you can then you might want to rethink why you are an Art & Design major.
ReplyDeleteThe above commenter is completely out of line. I don't know what blog he/she was reading, but this critique was far from "cynical". Mike starts off the bat with a of Julie's work by saying, "Julie's book was well made...". He moves into areas of improvement, just as any student needs to hear. As a teacher, I read this critique as a GREAT opportunity for Julie to learn from. He states his classmate asked for a hard hitting critique. I highly doubt Julie would "stop listening" if she is getting what she asked.
ReplyDeleteAlthough, I assume this commenter is Mike's Typography professor by the simple statement of "It’s not about what I what it’s about what works best for the project, and yes as an expert in the field my critiques carry more weight. "
In that case, he/she was completely unprofessional to post a comment that might reflect Mike's performance IN class. If he/she wants to talk to the student about his cynical attitude or not pushing himself enough, then she needs to conference with him instead of writing it on a public blog. It appears the professor doesn't take the time to properly communicate with his/her students in order for them to succeed. Instead, he/she is being childish and posting an irrelevant comment without getting Mike's immediate feedback.
Good job on your book critique, Mike. It's unfortunate of you to have such a lazy professor with bad communication skills.